exit, stage e a s t

( It's all gunshot, arrows, a flurry of projectiles and the passing downcast shadow of a creeping, large flying creature — then the scowling, scratched face of Watch Tower Master Kerasstone — ...before his pendant drops down, and you're treated to footage of rushed feet kicking the device back and forth between tower floor stones. At long last, Kerasstone's slammed to the ground, landing close enough to his pendant, grinning bloodily. )

WHAT GIVES THERE? GOOD MORNING, LADS! YOU SEE, IT'S BEEN RAININ'DOOOOOWWWWN! ALL ABOARD, EH?

( Excuse him, more... skirmish, with something like a harpy. Back to howling at the pendant. )

IT'S STARTIN' TO SMELL ALL ROT IN THE AIR. OR PIG. CAN'T TEEEEEEEEEEEEELL. BUT MEANS, USUALLY, THE LIKES OF HIM IN THE WOODS, HE'S PLANNING HIS NONSENSE! WITH THE CLAAAAAWWWWIIIIIIING. GOT TO KEEP YER FINE SELVES READIED! AND WATCHFUL! AND JOLLY, HAVE A DRINK, EH?

( ...he, for one, is somehow materialising a battered iron flask from behind his shield. ) NOW, I'M TELLING YOU: YOU FEEL A CAAAAAALLLLIIIIIING? TO THE WOOOOOODS? ALL A SUDDEN? AND IT AIN'T NATURE? DON'T BE SHY, WE ALL DO IT! OR YOU'RE A MITE MORE ANGRY, BUT IN THAT MIGHTY FINE WAY THAT LEAVES BEHIND A WEE BODY? AND YER UNCLE GRASSHIM HAS TO LOOK AT YOU ALL AWKWARD, GOING, LAD, AIN'T GOT NO WHERE TO BURY IT? YOUR AUNTIE WANTED TO RAISE'EM PETUNIAS IN THAT YARD???

( Look at this smiling face. Surely he's joking. )

YOU GET THAT ITCH, YOU KNOCK YOURSELVES OUT WITH THE CAST IRON PAN! OR A BOOK! AIN'T NO USE FOR THEM ELSEWISE! NOT THEM KITCHEN ONES, WE NEED'EM, THOSE... THE ONES WITH BIG WORDS! YOU CAN CHAIN UP TOO, I SUPPOSE, JUST NOT TO A WOODEN POST! SOME'S BROKEN FROM IT BEFORE! MAKE IT STONE AND BIIIIII —

( ...regrettably, an incoming catapult briefly brings him down to ground, and Deputy Watch Master Vataz, equally battered, sighs along the rest of the instruction: )

Yes. Keep watch of yourselves, knock yourselves out, drink, and... whatever he said about the frying pan. Don't be alarmed. Rathakku only Claws those who've been touched by death, when he despairs of his lack of progress. He can't hold it up for long. If he's starting now — it'll only be days. But he will be ruthless, and he will try to turn us to seize the Chamber of Seals. Hold the lines, and you will be victorious. We will all overcome this. We are better than him, stronger, braver, more lasting. We will persevere. Do not let yourselves be Claw —

( Wait, Kerasstone is sitting up again, as a blast rocks the tower. Scrambling to catch the pendant, he points it at... an explosion by the Castle's entranceways. )

HELL'S BELLS, WHASSAT BY THE LOWER GATES? SOMEONE LET ONE RIP??


( ooc: dated to the very late hours of 6 February / the start of 7 February, as Rathakku begins his Clawing of Feb. 7-10. On a voluntary basis, necromancers, characters who once died or who are very sensitive to life/death energies can be conscripted into Rathakku's army for this duration.

A Clawed Stephen Strange kicked off the mayhem with an explosion in the minor merchants' entryway.

Threadjack away in the comments! Kerasstone and Vataz can both answer — specify in your comment header if you prefer one over the other! )