text | un: wooden sword

[vdovy]

does anyone have a spare droid i can borrow

may or may not be returned in working condition

Comments

text | un: sling shot

[slippin]

[ There goes his dream of teaching one to mix drinks... ] Yeah, we'll be able to scrape by as a single-robot household.

You're gonna hold onto the parts, right?

[vdovy]

It should be mostly in one part, just... fried. Assuming my hypothesis pans out.

[slippin]

[ Hypothesis. Nice. Who doesn't love assigning huge words to destructive impulses? ] As long as it's not a puddle of molten slag we're good. I just need a few cogs and whirlygigs.

What's your hypothesis?

[vdovy]

That tasers will neutralize a droid. I am 98.7% sure the hypothesis is correct but I'd like to test for different degrees of tasering.

What do you need whirlygigs for?

[slippin]

Might wanna monitor noise levels too. [ "I hope the robots don't scream." ]

Oh, you know. Contingencies.

[vdovy]

I don't think it will be a problem. Tasers are very quiet. [ Yeah, she's not even considering any potential robot sentience. That would be so inconvenient. ]

Contingencies, huh? Do not worry, your kink secret is safe with me.

[slippin]

Yeah, but those robots have to be heavy. They're not gonna hit the ground at a gentle swoon. Plus there's alarms and self-destruct mechanisms.

Just for that you're getting the less sexy robot.

[vdovy]

That's a good point actually. I need to find a noise-dampening surface. Maybe a mattress?

Ha! So you admit you think the robot is sexy.

[slippin]

Hey. You're the one trying to get it in bed.

[ But okay. Mattress isn't bad but they're probably looking for something more on the portable side. ] Maybe a sleeping bag? Quilt? Damn shame to ruin a quilt though.

[vdovy]

Damn. I set myself up for that one.

Good thing about quilts? You can just patch up the burnt parts.

[slippin]

Since we just met and you have a taser I'll refrain from gloating. This time.

Can you? I mean, can YOU?

[vdovy]

Probably. It can't be harder than stitching flesh.

[slippin]

[ Eugh. The words "quilt" and "flesh" should not be used in this kind of proximity to each other. ] You do a lot of that?

[vdovy]

If a wound requires it.

You've never needed sutures? It's a very common procedure.

private

[saintclaire]

[ELBOWS HIM. Don't force the public to endure the sex robot jokes!]

[slippin]

[ Around a shit-eating grin, he mouths WHAT at her. Despite the fact that everything on the network is happening over text. ]

[saintclaire]

[ Just raised brows. She hears it in her head, sir, and that's enough! (Okay, there's a smile too.) ]