un: wooden dice.

[strewth]

[The voice is definitely English, a scouse accent mixing slightly with bits of Cockney, if one is the sort to recognize it.]

Lovely weather we're having in this sodding fishbowl. Nearly reminds me of home. Ah, hfff, something to lighten the spirit. I've got a story.

Have you lot heard of Ellethia? Couldn't tell you how it's spelled; I haven't the foggiest whether we're playing with Fake Latin or fake Greek. Gorgeous country, it is; proper Byronic. Maybe fake Greek, then.

It were haunted.

D'you remember a bloke prancing around during the communal head trip? Stroppy bastard he was, complaining to me about tea and infanticide. Reckon he had more sparkling conversation for you lot. Wore white. Ghosts in your Ellethia said he got a uniform from them. Or from there, at least.

Don't all rush to thank me. Weren't alone. Your girl Lila, she were dead helpful. Distracted the ghosts she did. I'm sure she'll love the credit, hehh.

And that'd make me John Constantine. [It rhymes with Clementine.] Ain't me first brush with ghosts, let's say. Magic, that rubbish, have you ever seen any? The real stuff, I mean.

Comments

video; un: pretty-pretty butterfly

[littlemimic]

[ "Your girl Lila" is shaking her head at all this. ]

Never had to go through so much trouble for clothes before, not even with special holiday discounts.

[strewth]

Honest, luv, with the hair I reckoned you'd have a taste for vintage cruelty-free tantric plant leather in your jackets, but I'll be happily proved wrong.

un: absterge

[downswing]

Cleanse, after Ellethia. Death lingers.

[strewth]

oh just getting out me sage and snakeroot. or was it nightshade. maybe ill just do hot yoga

honest mate i appreciate it and all but ill have a hot bath and a kebab first

video; un: tagged

[kahl_175]

Kahl not know El-leth-ia. [Really doesn't know it. He has to slow down even more to try and pronounce it.] That un-dead place?

See magic before, though. Tenno magic. [No Tenno here, though. Kahl wishes there were.]

Re: video; un: tagged

[strewth]

John know. John saw ghosts. What Tenno?

[Some coughing.] Ta, Tarzan.

un: Black Prince; text

[blackscales]

Your assertion that he wore the uniform of Ellethia matches my current assumptions. Equally, most of us are familiar with 'magic, that runbish', and our friend the Merchant's sparkling conversation.

Welcome to Akhuras.

[strewth]

Dodging the question, Ed. Tsk, tsk.

Akhuras. [When he says it, the name sounds almost like a cough.] The dimension, the world, the parish council, it is?

un: ut malum pluvia | audio

[somebadnews]

[ This sets of several alarms. He noticed that Lila was nowhere to be found following the Unwinding, only to find out that she went to Ellethia of all places. In the blink of an eye. Then came back with news about the man in white, with someone who just happens to have the exact same accent. The fuck is going on. ]

You were sent there to investigate, were you?

[ Is he offended the Merchant came to them first? ...Of course not. He loves hearing this secondhand from unreliable sources. ]

Is that all they said about him? The ghosts?

[strewth]

[Because John is an utter dickhead and also a considerable showoff, the following response is all in Latin. Church pronunciation, naturally. (He is making a gamble, and will probably be told to shut the fuck up, but something in his gut says fuck it, why not?)]

We were sent to investigate. I do my best work with an audience.

Ghosts are always cryptic fuckfaces. [The specific word he uses is irrumator.] He was in the island's uniform. What's that to you, evil rain?

audio; un: pretty-pretty butterfly

[littlemimic]

[ Lila waits a little bit while Five and Constantine have a chat before swooping in. ]

Was on my way to find you to give you a gift when Constantine beat me to the punch.

un: sling shot

[slippin]

[ The incoming flat, nasally accent is probably familiar. ]

How would I know? [ There's a skeptical flavor to it, but Jimmy's also mindful of the fact that he's conducting this conversation via pocket watch. ] What makes it real?

[strewth]

[There's a pause, and something murmured, barely audible: zolpidem umbrella.]

What makes it real? Come now, my son. It's real if you believed it.

un: man's greatest treasure; audio

[reparo]

[puts that audio on bc it sounds like home.]

Hello, John Constantine, welcome to the - erm - group? So to speak? Thank you for sharing the info with the rest of us. We've been working off of conspiracy theories and all, for the past while.

Mine is that he's the Merchant, of sorts. From before. Magic, ghosts and the Unwinding, we've got it all - and also time travel. Of sorts.

Anyway, hi. I'm Hermione Granger.

[strewth]

Conspiracy theories? Tell me what you lot've been nattering on about. Rich in whales you are, but I'm starved for gossip. Mistaken identity's a good start, though. Time loop?

I once knew a bloke spent two decade on the same hill, on the same bike. Thought he biked to the bloody moon, but he were there the whole time, stuck in 76'. Or '77. Something about lightsabers.

And one more thing, luv. You're bragging.

@windstorm

[weifinder]

So the man in white is factually dressed like an Ellethian. The ghosts didn't claim him as theirs, though, correct?

Welcome, John Constantine. Magic is found here in various forms, and plenty of ghosts.

[strewth]

Not that I know of. Dead hoard their secrets like pensioners.

Everywhere has ghosts and magic, if you know how to look. I were asking what truck you had with it. Hehh, you, specifically.

un: white pawn; voice

[chosenbylight]

[This man's meandering conversational skills remind Anduin of a certain pirate of his acquaintance, and he can't help but feel amused at the thought of Captain Fairwind. How might he be holding up, back in Azeroth, he wonders.]

Those of us who have been here for a while now have had more than our fair share of dealings with ghosts, magical creatures, and other unexplained phenomena.

As for myself however, I am personally very much acquainted with magic. "The real stuff", as you so describe.

[Sorry for his formality, John. The manners were bred into him, you see.]

[strewth]

[Where John's from, they just call that being posh. Accordingly, condescension-]

And what made it real, lad?

un: headless ragdoll | video

[matermali]

It is safe to assume that many within our company have become familiar with the...spirits, in one form or another. I have only seen them act out as memories. The dead have been quieter where I walk. Perhaps you are lucky.

[ Another from England pitches in, though her accent is very much...upper-class. There's nothing haughty about how she observes him, though, despite the fancy laced neckline near to her chin and properly tied-back dark hair. She's looking at him like he may, in fact, be a ghost...or a demon; the kind she wants to investigate further. ]

Magic seems to take on an unrecognizable form in this citadel, in my experience. Difficult to detect at times, but present nonetheless. You may yet see wonders you are unprepared for, Mr. Constantine.

[strewth]

[Feeling like a pinned butterfly in a glass cased collection isn't new to John, especially on the other end of a posh accent. His smile becomes a little sharper, his eyes a little brighter. This is good. Familiar.]

Have been, luv? Were they loud before? [To say nothing of his ghosts-- it's for the better.]

It ain't a wonder if you're prepared, ennit? Blimey, now I'm fulla questions.

video | un: dollhouse

[thedreamer]

Be more specific, mate. Magic - oh, would you look at that, I've just pulled a hedgehog out of a hat with my clever sleight of hand? Or, magic - this is the absolute best, most magical, delightful, life-affirming cup of tea I've ever had? Or! Magic - I travel around through space and time in my magic blue box? Or! As I've learned about recently - "magic" magic, with spells and potions and something something this shouldn't be possible but is?

[ The Doctor knows very well what he means when he says "the real stuff," he's just...having a bit of fun. He would also ordinarily inquire more about what's been shared, but he's gleaning plenty of information from the questions already being asked, so really, he feels that he's contributing something more useful to the conversation anyway. ]

[strewth]

[Ah, fallen for one of the classic blunders, expecting John not to chamelionize his own wording to suit his purpose. If he even meant what he said in the first place--]

'S all magic. I'm not the sort of twat who spells it with a 'J'. It's real if you gave a pull when you saw it. It's real if it got your blood pumping.

un : dappled peals of the parted seas (voice)

[beitangmoran]

Hmmmm....

[Let him tap his pendant a little, something's not working here.....]

... is the translation function broken?

[strewth]

[To be a dick, John answers in Aramaic:]

Yes. Very broken. Hit it again.

un : dappled peals of the parted seas (voice)

[scrapgege]

Magic isn't rubbish.

And there aren't any ghosts in this area. Which is not normal.

[strewth]

[...is someone playing a prank on him. Hmm.]

Magic is most certainly rubbish. I'd bloody know.

On that, we agree. There's a presence, though. Time got smeared on the canvas, and the painter's dancin'.

@taken for granite

[rumorate]

Lila has a habit of making herself helpful.

[Allison can at least say that much. It just depends on who she feels like being helpful to.]

I hadn't seen any magic before I came here. But ... you sort of can't avoid it in a place like this.

[strewth]

[A wheezing, sawing laugh, stuffed in the margins with a smoker's cough. Hehhh heh hehh-]

Right you are. That's our Lila, helping someone.

[He seems to have come to the same conclusion on his own. Less observation, more guts and guesswork. At that age, he was always a certain kind of helpful, too.]

What bit of magic tickles you the most, luv? Now that you've had a taste.