audio | un: xianxian of yunmeng jiang

[weifinder]

( water sloshes, Ouhrsson proclaims his bear-ish hello, and Wei Wuxian shrieks as a crack and the skidding of porcelain across stone begins this misadventure, while he scrambles to helpfully call for help in a very helpful and helpless way: )

Haaaaaaaahaaaahahahahahaaaa how is the bear?! The bear! The bear's back!?

( yes, we may be mid revolution. yes, someone wanted a quick bath to clean off all the blood, sweat, tears, and whatever else is plastering itself across a person. yes, this should have been straightforward.

but now to anyone not purely hearing over their closed magical network, a bear just shoved his tub into the hall and nudged it to the top of the stairs, at the bottom of which... the gathered unrestful groups of people are about to meet a very wet, very poorly clothed wei wuxian, considering the tub is already starting to slide down the stairs with surprising ease while he shrieks. )

Comments

[weifinder]

An adoring public ( laconic, lowly stated between gritted teeth ) does not wait for the niceties. Nor do revolutionaries, it seems.

( as to the last question, clipped around another laugh that's no laugh at all: )

Not meaningfully.

( scratches are pointless, bruising doesn't matter, but he can't say no without it reading as false to anyone with eyes once they look at him and see where his feet, thighs, knees, and notably on his shoulder, the early signs of bruising begin their slow blossoming. )

[downswing]

Scars improve men with stories. ( 'There is beauty in marks,' but Wei Ying never bore their shame well. ) Retreat.

[weifinder]

I'm in process. People are... people.

( "close." the sounds which are not his voice directly aimed to lan zhan are the ones of the crowd and laughter and hands and the dance of one naked man trying to not get felt up by a crowd, which as it turns out, is likely the only reason someone's not having a moment of "public indecency!" or figuring that part of a midwinter protest could be strip runs through the halls. one never knows. )

[downswing]

( Mortification is troubling business. )

...enough. The 'goddess' retires from performance. Inform them. The purpose of the ruse has expired.

[weifinder]

Inform them of what, my previous engagement?

( with his bath? either way, xunxian is too far out, lan zhan is debating how much meat he has to eat with moran, yangyang is attempting to flirt backwards, and wei wuxian is

tired, really, tired and wanting to not leap overheads. only fuck it, that's exactly what he's going to have to do, and this is why the next legend he's accidentally birthing right this moment is: the goddess reincarnate can fly. )

Goodbye, whatever dignity I thought I found.

( because he leaps backward, soaring over heads of the crowd through his cultivation techniques, and lands on the stairs, one foot on a higher step than the other. then gives them a jaunty wave, before he leaps again, and is as far as they can tell with the speed of it all: gone like that. )

And good riddance to you all.

( wei wuxian has no more fucks to give and instead of return to any possible bear being tamed, he ducks into the first room with an unlocked door, grabs a robe tossed over a chair, and proceeds down the hall wet, less dripping, and robed, looking positively grumpy until he actually finds someone.

... which, with his luck, is going to be some kind of witch, so there's that bit of his day. )

1/

[downswing]

( ...oh. Oh, it's a pretty thing, to glimpse your soulmate enthroned in all his cultivation glory, achieving the petty feats of acrobatics they teach child-disciples not to abuse, but Yunmeng never did learn elegance in moderation, now did it?

A fond, nostalgic sight. )

[downswing]

( ...and bare. So very, very bare. Through a blessing of vantage, Wei Ying carrying the communicator diminishes what the rest of the voyeurism-prone world can spy, but as for his many admirers below —

Well. Well, then. )

[downswing]

( That moment when a gang of strangers enjoys the bang of your soulmate's Old Timey OnlyFans account before you do. )

4/4

[downswing]

Your previous engagement. Yes.

[weifinder]

Yes, I'll tell them I'm off to bathe. Again.

( as that was his previous engagement. but look, at least he's now got someone else's robe, and is away from his onlyfans fans, which may or may not be a financial venture the merchant should capitalise on should Taravast not burn down before they all exist stage left. )

[downswing]

Tell them your soulmate loathes diversions. They may infer.


( You are welcome. )

[weifinder]

That my soulmate is a bear.

[downswing]

He has preceding claim to a bear.

[weifinder]

Yes, but if he's not one for disruptions, and the bear tossed me down the stairs, and he was not there, it does make it seem the bear was my soulmate. My rather irritated soulmate.

[downswing]

Then, further irritated tosses down stairs can be arranged.

[weifinder]

I have no desire to recreate Jin Ling's paternal half-uncle's mental scars, thank you!

[downswing]

Only to wed a bear.

[weifinder]

Wait, what? When did we get on the topic of marriage?

[downswing]

Wei Ying.

1/2

[weifinder]

... Lan Zhan?

i lied, 2/3

[weifinder]

( look he was just naked in public and he's a bit grumpy and there's this absurdness about marrying a bear and—

gasp.

man in bathrobe stops dead in hall, but does not drop dead, we are fine, it is all good. )

end

[weifinder]

Previous engagement?! When!

[downswing]

( And now, the hour, burden and rasped silence of another man, stranded dead in a different hall, politely embracing cowardice as the gentleman's guide to ongoing mental survival. )

Seek seclusion. The bear may return.

[weifinder]

Lan Zhan!

( while another's ongoing mental survival is fraying at the seams. )

[downswing]

( Hissed: ) What difference, now? You have your excuse. Serve it. They will leave you be.