un: absterge | video

[downswing]

( Two men and a xenomorph walk into a tavern —

...alternatively, stumble down a woodland road, breath staggered, seemingly drained — if not by the weight of the enormous forest creature they carry, bled and bound to a makeshift pallet of decayed logs, then by the constant, jittery effort to evade the strikes of its tail.

The Doctor drags the animal’s wooden bed by long, loosely woven strips of ripped cloth. Lan Wangji holds the pendant with one hand and his own cutting strings that fetter the beast with the other.

For their trouble, the creature’s tail lovingly smacks the Doctor on his flank, then thwaps Lan Wangji’s temple, on the swing back. It growls its thanks after, before settling into a... disturbing... purr... that seems to indicate the time to nap is nigh.

The Doctor, then: ) It's settling down a bit already! Just needed a proper looking after, really, like anything.

( Well said, Doctor. For your effort, have a nice, friendly, sleepy tail smack on the back. So Wangji doesn’t feel jealous, the snoring beast peers over his shoulder, drenching it in a sea of... drool. He sighs. )

We bear one of the Beastmaster’s creatures. Feral, wounded. Enemy of the Huntress in the woods.

( Who should have been long culled, but don’t let Lan Wangji’s long-suffering expression convince you of that. The enemy or their enemy, so on. )

It requires... healing to resume duties. We number those who know the care of animals?

( ooc: ...sorry, cave buddies, just going to park Fido in the back real quick! Any veterinarians in the house? )

Comments

[downswing]

No. ( The very blandest. ) What choice?

[rumorate]

... There are some choices.

[She pauses as she considers.]

It's only hunting the Huntress? Or are other people getting in it's way?

[downswing]

It... does not discriminate, then.

[rumorate]

Great. Then we probably want to limit available prey. Is there something big and out of the way we can contain it it?

[She really needs to get the lay of the land better.]

[downswing]

A dearth of monstrous pens.

[rumorate]

That's unfortunate.

[She could try and come to rumor it into submission but that doesn't sound like it would end well when things wore off.]

If you need back up, let me know. I can try and help you restrain it if you need to.

[downswing]

Perhaps if you may retrain it.

[rumorate]

... Can you train it like training a dog?

[Reinforcing good behavior with treats or some shit?]

[downswing]

Can you?


( If anyone can, the harpy whisperer might stand a chance. )

[rumorate]

I can try?

[She frowns.]

It eats meat, I'm guessing?

[downswing]

Prodigiously.

[rumorate]

I'll see what I can find.

[And then, on the off chance it can be reasoned with:]

Does it talk?

[downswing]

Muteness has not before prevented you.

[rumorate]

Yeah, well ... if the Beastmaster gave it some kind of prime directive, I don't want to fuck it up. So if I can talk to the thing and negotiate, maybe, it might be more productive.

[It should still get to hunt the Huntress.]

[downswing]

...your language.

[rumorate]

... You're in a room with a giant murder monster and you want to waste time chiding me about my language?

[Especially when it seems like it's her talented tongue he's asking for.]

[downswing]

Do I alone recall our group's children?

[rumorate]

... They risk their lives fighting zombies on the regular and you're worried about my language?

[Sorry, Allison is foulmouthed and she's unapologetic about it.]

[downswing]

You have a family. You comprehend.

[rumorate]

I do. But there are worse words out there than fuck.

[She's just saying.]