un: blushing beads of heft and beauty | audio | After Sizhui and Eleven question the miners

[paperbutterflies]

[ Sizhui hasn't spoken much over the network, but for those who know him, he sounds extremely subdued, though his words are clear and his voice calm. The execution has not happened yet, so. ]

This is Lan Sizhui. For those who might be curious, Eleven and I talked with the two miners that... were taken.

In short, their story started when they were snowed in - and iced in - for far too long inside the mine. They had not expected that, so there were no provisions. First one, then another of their number died of hunger, and then the two dead bodies reanimated and ... asked what they would give for the hunger to stop.

What they are becoming, they chose, under duress.

The two who had died first already became among Unhalad's soldiers. I do not know why the remaining six were asked to choose it, rather than waited out to be just taken. I don't think they know, either.

And if they remember what exactly was done to them after they agreed, they are not telling us.

I think this is more or less the information we found from them. Thank you for your attention.

Comments

un: dappled pearl of the parted seas [voice]

[beitangmoran]

So they did not know how the first two came back to life? Or did they choose not to tell?

... How does this work? It doesn't make any sense. It's as if some of these people have absorbed something beforehand that might turn them.

[paperbutterflies]

I am sorry, Senior. When I asked, all I was told were reassurances that they really were dead. However, they did not die at the same time, but rose simultaneously. The two here were surprised by that.

[beitangmoran]

This is completely illogical. If they were alone when it happened, then who did it. Or was it done to them in advance, knowing that such a tragedy might befall them and preparing for it? Why would two of them wake early and then turn the others...

[Sorry, Sizhui, he's basically thinking out loud.]

Unhalad has something to hold these people, beyond his undead soldiers. In the way he makes them undead. It seems like it might strike anyone.

[paperbutterflies]

I... am sorry. Other than the miners, who must have worked there for a long time, not expecting the cold or the probability to being trapped by the ice - they indicated nothing that I could think of to have been different about this trip to the mines in the first place.

[ He wishes he could answer, but... ]

[beitangmoran]

It seems we are ending up with some answers, and even more questions.

But then, not much makes logical sense in this world.

un: deft hand of little deaths [Voice]

[scrapgege]

I don't understand why they were so scared of me. And...

When I saw them, I felt like something inside of me wanted me to kill them.

[paperbutterflies]

It... you were among those who drank from Anurr's drink, or am I mistaken? If what the angry lady from a couple of days ago said matters...

These two have given themselves to Unhalad, and you have, in a way and temporarily, given yourself to Anurr. Perhaps that is why? Or... part of why.

[scrapgege]

Hm, that makes sense.

I'l definitely not drinking any of that again. That was... It's not a good feeling.

[paperbutterflies]

That... would probably be for the better. We are already taken to this place; to be taken over more completely will probably not be a great thing.

[scrapgege]

[It's not great, and a bit too reminiscent of some things Xie Lian would not like to be reminded of, to be honest.]

Where are they now? I probably shouldn't come too close to them.

un: heart-fluttering hummingbird | audio

[downswing]

( His son, his only son. Battered and reshaped by horror. The nature of their craft. )


...cleanse. Free your mind of their restlessness.

[paperbutterflies]

Yes, Hanguang-jun.

Although...

How much such... restlessness has been ignored, since this all began?

[downswing]

( He hesitates. Then: )

Yours, or their own?

[paperbutterflies]

[ ... blink. Blink blink. ]

... why would mine matter? I am not the one pushed to choose in such a way, nor hurt. I was just wondering how many people have been trapped so, and chosen so, and had to change.

[downswing]

You are the one who bears their story now.

( It takes from a man. Lessens him. )

to action

[weifinder]

( There's information, of course, and Wei Wuxian's familiarity with the quartz at this point is such he doesn't fail in listening, in recognising voices even if he doesn't respond. Hearing his son's voice, the breakdown of what a polite questioning was, versus what a painful extraction would be, is information that arms them, is information that bears a cost in the horrors of this place slowly sinking below the skin.

He doesn't want it to settle in Sizhui's bones, not the way that the Burial Mounds had for Wei Wuxian, when he'd been closer to his age than he is now. Two died, and were found by something, to be raised together; extending out a hand to force agreement, take the rest of the living, and he wonders if that leaves more strength, if there's something else in a willing death that carries over to the form found later. Or if it was simply expediency, not wanting to wait for people to starve, when water at least could melt from snow and slowly, slowly kill them with the cold...

... or if the cold could leave a window for the Anurr, if deaths granted or rescue provided was yet another factor, weighed in.

He finds Sizhui, rather than speak on crystal, before he looks for the ones questioned. There is no question in his mind anymore that their deaths are certain, and the mercy of their true deaths earned; he'll reach out to Archeval next, but his son comes first.

(There will be no next. Lan Wangji and Alina wil move, motivated by guilt and righteousness, before he can.) )

Hey, you. ( He smiles, a sedate expression, eyes old and knowing, limbs loose as he approaches. Humming a note on a familiar key, he comes closer, then pauses... opening his arms and lifting his brows as he fumbles into a: ) Would you like a... you know.

( A hug. From a man unpractised in them, but used to reassuring and reaffirming touch, and who still remembers Sizhui best as the child who clung tight, and was small enough to lift up to his hip and hold him there. There are echoes of that young boy even in the adult, but the adult is the one he's hugged, had stood there wooden and slow to respond, and the one he thinks might... might benefit from it, now.

He'd appreciated hugs, once. Back before he'd 'died.' )

Closest to a hug I have as an icon.

[paperbutterflies]

[ Sizhui is shaken, but he is not crashed. There are aspects of this which remind him of Mo village; there are other aspects that remind him of the statue...

In the end, this is neither of those, yet having lived through them, having talked to the people who were there before and after they happened lets him retain a shred of clarity under the crushing sadness.

Still, at the offer, Sizhui (carefully) launches himself into those arms, wrapping his own around the older man's body, holding on tight as he buries his face into the dark-clad shoulder. ]

Senior Wei.

[ ... clarity or not, even still he is trembling slightly.

No, he does not doubt that the men will die, either. They do not know how to stop, let alone revert, the change; what is left to do, other than make sure they cause no more harm? But he... ]

I... don't know how to help anyone in this place.

[ Back home, they can try. They know what the dangers are, and how to cleanse. Here, they know so little. ]

lmf lans holding passed out weis

[weifinder]

( He exhales in a long sort of sigh as he lets his arms settle around Sizhui in turn. He's still not the most practised, more used to being hugged than hugging, and both are remnants of his youth more than recent days, but he manages. There's no surprise and no shock leaving his hands held up, shy of touching. )

I know. ( Which is obvious, probably, but he strokes one hand over Sizhui's hair, like his shijie had done for him as a younger man. ) Right now, there's so much information and time we're lacking to make ourselves useful in the same ways here as we are back home. We'll find better ways we can help, but we're going to fail, too. What we learn from our mistakes and failures, how we don't repeat those, how we succeed later, it doesn't make right now feel better. But we don't stop here.

It happens more often than you'd think.

[paperbutterflies]

[ Little A-Yuan had been rather clingy, but then again, people had used to hold him all the time to prevent him from walking into danger early on,and it had stayed so until touch had become a cause for actual pain for another. Then he had learned to hold back, and then slowly begun to re-learn.

And yes, Wei Wuxian, Xian-gege, senior Wei, he has been one of those he had never hesitated to touch, and who'd touched in return. Holding his hand, picking him up, holding him away from things.

It is comforting.

He breathes out, sagging slightly. ]

I think it is that I feel like we didn't try much, though I know that I did, and I suspect others did, and probably still are trying.

But... of course we don't stop.

[weifinder]

( He makes himself a bulwark now, in a way he hasn't let himself be since Yunmeng Jiang burned, since the life he knew had been sacrificed on the pyre of the Wens. It's not a clan's disgrace to carry the actions of its main branch; he's never held it against the Dafan Wens, couldn't make it easy and simply let them suffer for being born to one clan, and not another.

Could not watch another child and mother shot down from behind by the Jin's archers, in the name of righteousness. He misses his juniors. He missed A-Yuan.

Having him back again was finding a part of his heart he'd left for dead still knew how to beat in time with the rest. )

No, we don't. We don't stop, and we don't give in. We feel everything we feel, whatever the emotion, but we don't let it be what stops us from going forward. We reflect, we learn, we get back up. It's not the falling that's the problem, and failure is not bad, it's instructive. It's staying down... it's giving in to the thought that this failure is the one we can't come back from, that's a problem.

( He doesn't know if there is a solution to the undead of this world. There's not one to theirs, but there is a way to bring back someone from possession; he knows that, had worked hard on it. Here, the process, the way they change... he doesn't know if it can be the same, but only in learning more can they find out, one way or another. )

also same day early evening

[weifinder]

( Finding his son, he greets him with a smile and squint of his eyes that makes them look more pleased than he might be: though he is pleased, each time he sees Sizhui. It's just in passing this time, so he waves to him and hands over a small wrapped bundle. Inside, a carved mahogany comb, fully clean, and a note which Sizhui's free to read.

Side by side, facing everything. Learning together, walking together. )

Sizhui! Would you make sure this gets back into your father's hands?

... dads what happened now

[paperbutterflies]

Of course, Senior Wei!

[ Sizhui takes the bundle calmly, not trying to read the note. And then, with the same calm-cheerful voice, ] is there a reason for not giving it to him yourself? Not that I mind talking with either of you to deliver it, but I would like to know what to expect.

[ He is fine with being used as part of Senior Wei's tricks. But if this is going to upset Hanguang-jun, he would rather be prepared. ]

nothing muhc, rich dad having an adjustment period, it's fiiiine

[weifinder]

( There's an easy smile from Wei Wuxian, and he clasps Sizhui's shoulder. )

Hanguang-jun is having trouble adjusting to certain, ah, aspects of the ongoing... lack of normal luxuries, and to compensate has decided to forgo gifts. Including practical ones.

( He brings his hand away again, smile smaller, shaking his head. )

He's against me, not against you. He'll be more bothered if he has to start trusting in finger combing alone, and his ability to bargain is... haaa, anyway, there are things you can do I can't. Asking young master Sizhui to bear with the trespass.

oh dear gods

[paperbutterflies]

[ Sizhui blinks, considering this.

Then takes a deep, deep breath. ]

Senior Wei, Hanguang-jun is not against you.

[ Starting with the obvious here. ]

But he is used to things being a certain way, and it is all right to not aggravate things.

[weifinder]

( he blinks, then actually laughs, reaching out to rub the top of Sizhui's head. )

Sizhui, I've never thought he was against me, ah? But I'm also easy to be against, if you understand what I mean.

( He's safe, in a way; when one is not used to things, one can lean into what's familiar, and press back against it. He doesn't mind, precisely, but he does think aspects of it are silly, and aspects are easier to accept from someone who Lan Zhan protects in a very different way.

He raised Sizhui, he's possessive of him, his language and his twitch of his fingers shows it, no real mystery. He doesn't find it strange, and where it frustrates is in feeling like he's being cut out of something he likewise doesn't really know he has any right to. His son. Their son. Lan Zhan's son.

Sixteen years dead, what kind of claim does he have that isn't a shadow of a time barely remembered? )

He can allow you to give him things that are harder coming from me. Besides... he has so much hair, Sizhui. All that hair. Is he going to have to finger comb that for days.

( Looking at Sizhui with his eyebrows gently lifted. )