[Audio]

[scrapgege]

I know not many people might be familiar with this, but... I need help to organize a ghost wedding.

[There are enough cultivators here that Xie Lian is pretty sure at least some of them will know what he is talking about.]

I have never had to do this, so I'm not quite sure exactly what rituals are involved. And it has to be a double wedding too, and I need to find one family with an son who died unwed and who would not mind this... I can ask around the village.

.... Do you think this might cost a lot of money to organize? Because that could be a problem ...

[He still has no money, and Yun Yifeng hasn't started his cult yet, so...]

Comments

[scrapgege]

I guess I could... but I wonder if I might not need to take the place of the girl whose curse I am carrying.

We could probably repurpose some of the dresses from the fox weddings, I'm sure. They might as well serve for good.

[wooden_one]

...

[He made a face. Yeah. Let's not do that. It brings up a lot of annoying memories.]

We can just make some paper dolls. We wouldn't want to accidentally marry you to someone.

[scrapgege]

Alright, well, I have all of their names so that should be easy enough.

Can I ask you to meet me near the shrines later, daozhang? Since you're so knowledgeable. Once I have found a suitable candidate for her, it'll be easier. I'll go talk to the family of the girls first.

[wooden_one]

Fine. [Since you need his help.] Just let me know when.

[scrapgege]

[It takes one more week before Xie Lian messages again.]

Daozhang, I found a candidate! this family has a son who died unwed and without children,a nd I think I convinced them by saying that this would help take care of his soul in the afterlife.

[wooden_one]

Then I'll come meet you.

[In the meantime, he may or may not have been making paper things for burning. If pressed he would claim he was free and there was nothing else to do.]

[scrapgege]

[.... Of course, not one would dare suggest you are a caring person who does stuff like that.

Xie Lian totally will of course, but later.]

I am near the ancestors' shrines. I know it's a bit strange for a wedding but given that they are all ghosts...

[wooden_one]

[How dare!!!]

No, a shrine works just fine for a ghost wedding.

[scrapgege]

[he's a god, Chuchu, try and stop him.

... then again Chu Wanning would totally fight a god.]

I found some incense, and I have all the funeral tablets with me.

[wooden_one]

[He would 100% fight a god.]

I have made the clothes from paper.

[And hastily sewn two little bags too while he was at it...because you know. He just happened to have time.]

There shouldn't be much else we need.

[scrapgege]

How do we go about this, then ? Because, well, the funeral tablets can't really bow...

[And who should officiate....]

[wooden_one]

If their spirits cannot be present then we can just manage the bows for them.

[He sounds impatient. Let's just meet and get this over with! If anything is unclear he can just demonstrate!]

[scrapgege]

Alright, well, we're waiting for you here, daozhang, whenever you are ready.

[wooden_one]

[He won't take long to arrive at the shrine. He's carrying something wrapped in cloth, from the sound it makes as he walks, it seems like it might be paper.]

Let's get started.

[Because saying hello is too...social. They should just get down to business.]

[scrapgege]

Hello !

[Sorry, no one ever told Xie Lian about being too social, so he'll give a little bow.]

The funeral tablets are here. This is the original couple, and this is the twin sister and the candidate for her.

Time to make shit up.

[wooden_one]

[Who would have told him that anyway?]

Good. [He lays what he was holding on the ground then peals back the fabric to reveal...wedding clothes, but made out of paper. It's very detailed! Two sets of each.]

We can burn these for them first. So their spirits may receive them.

Re: Time to make shit up.

[scrapgege]

... You're really good at this, daozhang! They're so pretty!

Should we write their names on them, as well, before we burn them?

[wooden_one]

[Hmph!]

Who said I made them?

[2 things. 1: where else would these have come from? 2: no one directly accused you of anything why are you being so defensive?]

That would be the best thing to do. To make sure they don't go to the wrong person. [He lays each one down carefully.]

[scrapgege]

.... Who else could have?

[Did he just call you out to your face, Chuu Wanning? Yes, he did.]

I'll do that.

[Xie Lian's calligraphy is beautiful and elegant, flowing from his fingers.]

There!

[wooden_one]

...

[He has no answer for that.]

...stop making useless conversation!

[He's not embarrassed you're embarrassed!!

Once the names are written it's a simple matter to burn them....though he puts one set aside. Best to finish one marriage then the other. Then, with a small application of spiritual energy, he burns one set of wedding clothes.]

Someone will have to carry each tablet to help them do the bows.

[Which....uh. There are only the two of them so....]

[scrapgege]

Alright, let's do it!

[And Xie Lian, very naturally, just picks up the tablet closest to him, which happens to be the groom, because Chu Wanning is cursed to be the bride in every universe.

Once the bows are done for the first couple, and the tablets put together, on the altar, all they have to do is repeat for the second couple.

Xie Lian quickly lights some incense and puts a few offerings in front of both sets of tablets, and clasps his hands.]

Thank you very much, daozhang. I don't think I could have done it without you.